Hanging out at my place

take a sip of that cheap whiskey

on the top shelf

of your most ugly cupboard

light a Classic

complain about the world

talk politics

snigger and make dirty jokes

about women

then start crying

and confess how much you actually love them

and how alone you really are

now talk about children

and their little feet

and their inability

to be anything

but gullible and impressionable

and how, if you could

you would, make one for yourself

and perhaps for your partner,

if the woman agrees

let the conversation veer

towards old age and erectile dysfunction

let Sid remark that dysfunction of the cock

is also common among young men

laugh at him

tell him he is taking it too personally

now crack a silly limmerick

about his wife’s vagina

and his flaccid ego

hurt his feelings

let him contemplate not hanging out

with you guys anymore

now bid them goodbye

apologise to Sid

thank the guys for beer

close the door

now sit at your desk

open your laptop

and start writing

don’t worry about the font

and the alignment

write every single word

that comes to you

don’t illustrate

don’t elucidate

try not to be too serious

now close the damned thing

and retire into the night

struggling to pee

without hurting yourself.

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